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Catching Big Waves - a trader's journal of surfing the the markets
Broke the cycle today. Shorted the open, scalped a little long after the burst, net 134. And never felt uncomfortable. I am visiting a friend in WV and traded in his media room, in a balck leather reclining movie chair, ultra dim lighting, projector screen. Very surreal. Same room yesterday, but I lost decently in the first half and made it all back +20 in the afternoon, really nothing after costs.
@zt379 has been sharing some info with me recently. Very thoughtful.
I had a beautiful long setup this afternoon, but scalped instead of going for a swing, mostly because I was already up considerably. I do not like that habit. When I am up I should trade until I take a loss, or have a certain drawdown of the day, but instead I become more conservative. I am trying to correct that, but how hard it can be sometimes to train myself to not feel a certain way.
Topstep has started offering NT, I am expecting to do the 150k combine sometime soon. Also looking at another prop firm that increases your capital for every $1k in profit.
Crude continues to whip back and forth in a staggered trading range. It will break free, and catch a lot of traders off guard possibly when it does. But catching the "real" break can get frustrating. I hoped for a downside move today, but it caught the minor trendline and I guessed better today. Sat out after the second morning trade until the trend reversal, then scalped long.
It is becoming a bit of an ascending triangle. Or a complex H&S looking further back.
Still think the big boys are loading up for a rally long back up to and past the 100 level
But yes the last week or two has been pretty frustrating for me two, i just have been trading more conservative with quicker targets
Sharp pullbacks
Value rejection below 90`s.......
" I will follow my rules, I will take my stops, I will be disciplined and i will work with the market....NOT AGAINST IT! Professional mind control is the key"
Look like its time to migrate over to the 12-12 CL my dear kind Sir
" I will follow my rules, I will take my stops, I will be disciplined and i will work with the market....NOT AGAINST IT! Professional mind control is the key"
I stopped trying to guess and just trust the 6 range.
Monday was down about -80, Tuesday/Wed were positive but flat to negative after costs, Thursday and Friday netted roughly +230. I started to expect the sharp reversals by Thursday.
I am actually anticipating the break lower now, but last night was bullish with the complex inverted H&S.
Somewhat of an unusual topic for me tonight, at a friend's halloween party. All in costumes, shifting our make-believe reality on the physical level for a few hours. Drinking alcohol, altering our behavioral reality for a few hours perhaps. Meeting and talking with so many others who are going through major changes in their own lives.
Reality. Simple concept. Understanding it in a physical sense is a no brainer. In a situational, or theoretical, or environmental perspective, all fairly easy to define it at that level.
But mentally, psycologically, it can be different things in the shift of a thought, or a feeling, or an experience. Over the past few days mine has been so many things, rarely sitting still. In that realm, it becomes as we create it. And it can be heavily influenced by our past, or our wants, or our image of ourselves, or our involvement in that particular moment.
What will I cause mine to become? The more I know the answer, the more likely I know the outcome.
Indulge me for a bit, I am neither as eloquent nor as comprehensive as others (i.e. - Lornz, Fat Tails, Tigertrader, Panda and of course Big Mike)
I wish I could portray how essential it is to give up expecting things to be easy when trading the market. A degree of fatality is essential. No matter how large my account, or how small my position - it is essentially to keep trading as if that trade will be my last. I may not blow my account with 20 losing trades this way, but I might certainly lose my way mentally - that is equally dangerous (if not more).
Last year, in my own trading, fall trading blew all my profit expectations. Made my year and then some. I could do not wrong.
This year, I have better tools, am more rounded and simplfied and yet can do little right. My win rate has dropped to about 40% (from 58%ish). My only weapon is my instinct to survive. That is all that matters - if I can't survive, I can't be around to see the sun come out. And smell the wet grass.
I have already had what I call a piss poor year, but I am here, I have my capital and I can't wait for every single day to trade when I am not taking time off.
Find a way Gary. I believe that way will involve backing off a bit, being less intense and not more, thinking less, and just letting it be.....but your ways maybe be different.
You are most certinaly not alone. The missing piece in trading, is in my humble opinion, NOT in trading. Maybe have a look at Kespert's words again...
What will I cause mine to become ?
Becoming exists NOW.
Hence what am I being.
"The more I know the answer the more likely I know the outcome"
There is no answer (imo) indeed there is no need for an answer,
the seeking of which created/s the belief, the illusion that there is
and our suffering that seeking is.
We cannot know the outcome, rather we can only know what is NOW and through our experience of NOW
we see the awareness that changes the perception of NOW and hence our experience of it...
Which may well be what you stated..
As @Deucalion says (and apologies if I'm understanding this out of context)
"but I am here"
Be well
From Godfather Part 3:
Michael Corleone: I feel... I'm getting wiser now.
Kay Corleone: The sicker you get, the wiser you get, huh?
Michael Corleone: When I'm dead, I'm gonna be really smart.
