If the higher time 5WM is going to hold, and the local DB intermediate 5WM is not going to manifest, then, the 2nd test of the ETH trendline could signal the top of W2, or, I was taught to view a 786 as interchangeable with a DT/DB.
And, since I keep expecting a breakdown in ES, that was enough to shake me out.
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Last edited by GaryD; September 4th, 2012 at 04:11 PM.
Thanks for the support. Without the outside input I might have quit journaling awhile back. Whether I get advice, or give advice, or just leave a description of the changes that go on in one trader's mind, so possibly someone else down the road does not feel so screwed up for having all of this inner conflict...
Yes, scalping has it's place, and some days it may be the best thing going. But I am going on over a year now of debating whether or not I can go to trading full time. The arguments I have for and against it in my mind are getting old to me. I seem stuck in a rut of what I find "comfortable", but I also believe I am doing it at the expense of moving forward.
If I did not have this hard push going on within myself to hold trades for longer than I do, I would be a happy little scalper. But today, where I am and where I think I want to be, scalping can be a weakness. Depending on how and why I do it.
I was in a long this morning, peeled out of it and held one. And watched it get into the 40+ profit area, then come back on me. I closed +29, which could be seen as failing to hold, but that to me is different. I saw something that could have been a sell trigger for me, had I been flat and looking to short the market. Getting out "early" is a tough thing to define. What is "early"? It depends on what is happening. And that exit today is the kind of benefit I am happy to maintain from knowing how to scalp.
But, the trades from last month that I looked over this weekend showed me something other than confidence or skill. They showed someone who was gun shy, timid, taking trades for money that are not exactly good trades. 6ticks? I know for an absolute fact that I never have a 6-tick stop loss. I do not go in any less than 10, 12, 15, and even that is tight for where my stop bar rests. I close early a lot, and may close -6 if I see something, but that is not the pattern that last month's trading reflected. What I saw was "trigger happy", and the more I went back and analyzed my trades, there more sure I was of it.
I am actually afraid of burning into my psyche that scalping as a preferred method is "good", particularly when I am not doing it in a manner that I find commendable. It feels comfortable. I can make money a lot of the time. And that becomes addicting. And, it holds me down from doing some other things that I want to integrate into my trading.
I do not desire to eliminate small targets, I feel they are what keeps me alive to some degree. But when I see 500 trades versus 10, or whatever the ratio was, there is no way I was trading the way I want to be. Backsliding even.
Being too quick to exit is my number one issue I have with myself, and I am continuing to drive it into my automatic behavior. I was trained, by others and by myself, to get in and out fast. There are a lot of reasons... small risk, instant gratification. Number one may be that trading educators can keep an audience more entertained that way. It is good for sales.
I take myself out of so many good trades that would produce 2x, 4x, 6x of what I receive from them, and it is not that those targets are something I don't expect. I feel I know better, or I should know better, and I feel sometimes like I will not step up and take more responsibility for my trading. And what keeps me from doing it, I think, is fear.
I do not completely accept the risk or the reward of many trades I take. And the only way I will ever be able to truly add swing trading to my regular arsenal is by learning to do just that. And I trade the growth of that ability, for $100 here and there, month after month.
The flip side, if I do not manage a trade, actively, I do not do as well.
I really am just journaling my own frustrations with my own inner progress. Not really even looking for feedback most of the time anymore. Not that I mind it, it is good to have company. I am trying to wake myself up, and this is where I do it. Ugly at times. Painful. I feel I take the role of master and student with myself, and the student is very stubborn sometimes.
Because of my time spent this weekend that showed me something I was not even paying attention to while it was happening, and the self-criticism that I felt was appropriate, I traded differently today. I could see it very clearly. Today is much more the way I would like to trade.
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I can't count the number of moves I missed due to overnight.
I have not been at this long enough to have an opinion on something changing. I am still soaking up what is going on in real time, so it just feels normal to me.
Possibly what happens, is the movement is constantly changing? We think we have it down, and then it just changes again? Not sure, but I'll find out in 10 years or so. Still getting into the rhythm of what is today.
The "ain't even worth it" comment. There is one of my main complaints with scalping for small ticks. So many dollars turning over, so much risk layered time and time again, for something thought of as having so little potential? CL will at least move 20 ticks, even if it is sitting still.