Was observing the CL today.
My set up did not show up today.
Attempted another set up, it did not work out as planned.
Attempted a multiple of times. The price did not budge.
A Scratch day today.

Emotionally i felt a bit better. Still nervous ticking in the stomach, but it did feel a bit better.
I followed my risk management rules

Was observing the NQ, CL and 6E
My set up did not show up.
And i also started the day with the hesitation on the CL.
Hesitation came because i was not prepared today.
Was playing another B level set up.
Didn't do so well. because i started watching my PnL and became the PnL trader.
I started thinking about the outcome of each trade. What a head game that is!
The broker will be happy again today Over-trading to the Maximum!!

LOL

This little public humility journal is the best thing i have ever done.
There is no control of my lunacy, i am embracing this moment.

Was observing the HG, GC, and CL. Naturally, it did not dawn on me to check the May contract for the CL. (1st mistake)
I was talking to my brother about the GC having a possible harmonic pattern.
And the whole trading day after our conversation was done i was attempting to find that harmonic by an overwhelming number of times.
All together i think i had my personal best record of contracts pushing through a single day: 136!
My trading commission alone today is $544 minus my attempts to catch that harmonic pattern.
And naturally after i did catch it, i ran away from a +40 move that i was in on with two lots that would have brought me back from the mental oblivion.
The market is my school. And the tuition fee varies, lol!

My set up did show up on the CL today, but i did not see it since i was on April contract.
The CL did bring a good last trade of the day.
It was a B level set up, for a +20 ticks on a single to ease quietly this monumental day of over trading.
I wish i played an extra lot on that trade, + would have + could have + should have!
And to think i was over trading yesterday as well. I ought to be re-reading this journal before i start each day.

All together i feel ok. Maybe what i did is not hitting me yet.
Today is the worst day and the best day in my journey attempting to move from an analyst to a trader.

It seems like your struggling with some conflicting psychologies... but I'll leave that alone. Instead, an observation:

If you're a systems trader (or pattern trader, as you've suggested), and your system has a proven mathematical edge, then you have to let the law of large numbers work for you by taking every signal that your system generates, and each trade has to play out accordingly. Reading through your journal, it is almost looks like you're sabotaging your system with discretionary overrides (not taking signals, moving stops, taking off wins, not letting the trade mature, etc.).

I don't know what platform your using or whether your stop/profit criteria is always the same, but if so, you might benefit from bracketing your order before you ever press execute. Then just let the trade mature, for better or worse.

MarkB 

If you're a systems trader (or pattern trader, as you've suggested), and your system has a proven mathematical edge, then you have to let the law of large numbers work for you by taking every signal that your system generates, and each trade has to play out accordingly. Reading through your journal, it is almost looks like you're sabotaging your system with discretionary overrides (not taking signals, moving stops, taking off wins, not letting the trade mature, etc.).

And yet, it's still hard to do.

I think that mastering the psychological issues of trading (being at risk, making money, losing money, not knowing what the hell will happen next, etc. ) are what most of us struggle with.

I suspect that, if given a foolproof system, most traders would still not be able to exactly follow it. This seems to be the challenge, more than anything of a technical or systems nature.

Bob.

MarkB 

It seems like your struggling with some conflicting psychologies... but I'll leave that alone. Instead, an observation: If you're a systems trader (or pattern trader, as you've suggested), and your system has a proven mathematical edge, then you have to let the law of large numbers work for you by taking every signal that your system generates, and each trade has to play out accordingly. Reading through your journal, it is almost looks like you're sabotaging your system with discretionary overrides (not taking signals, moving stops, taking off wins, not letting the trade mature, etc.). I don't know what platform your using or whether your stop/profit criteria is always the same, but if so, you might benefit from bracketing your order before you ever press execute. Then just let the trade mature, for better or worse.

Thank you MarkB, An absolute truth. And well said!
Yes. I am sabotaging everything with discretionary overrides.
It's on my not to do list for the next week.
Playing the game on the ninja 7. Stop loss is about the same every time. Targets vary.

Day 14 idiocy moved the account below the $10K belt.

Day 15 was observing the CL and ES.
Had my set up to SELL on the CL at 9am.
Attempted to short 4 times on 2 lots. The last attempt worked, both targets were reached.
ES had a set up BUY. Only played 1 lot for 1 target.
Good day. Trading by the rules.
And not killing my emotional capital and my physical account with discretionary overrides

Was observing the CL and ES.
My set up showed up on both instruments. I chose to dance with CL.
It turned out not to be as fruitful. The ES did reach both intended targets.
The CL was dancing sideways. It was back and forth again.
At that point i was -46. My stop loss is very short and it did not help me at all today.
The last execution trigger contributed + 31 but unfortunately i only had emotional capital to play 1 lot
That would have made my day if i was emotionally stronger.
(would have could have should have)

I waited for my set up again, and it was moving sideways again before it did do what it usually does.
I attempted to grab some there as well but was mentally caught up in the PnL
Price did move respectively +25 and +14 without your truly
(would have could have should have)

-27 day + commission

You trade a lot. Is that 55 round turns today? I don't know what your system is but that seems excessive for a systems trader. Are your commissions super cheap or something? Are you hitting out a lot because your stop is close or..? Just curious.

MarkB 

You trade a lot. Is that 55 round turns today? I don't know what your system is but that seems excessive for a systems trader. Are your commissions super cheap or something? Are you hitting out a lot because your stop is close or..? Just curious.

Yes 55 round turns today. My stop loss is 10 cents, but i move it closer right away.
The set up shows on average once per day. But today it showed up 4 times.
And it overlapped on the CL. And i got caught in the chop.
If if i chose to play the ES set up today, it would have been 4 or 5 trades for the day.