You can only correct things by using a point of reference. Without it you won't know what to change. Repairing your mind out of nothing will just add to your confusion. If as you wrote you consistently lose then just working on your mind won't help. A good frame of reference is a unified whole.
Ok trend maybe I misunderstood you...let me use an example. Suppose I'm with my wife and we need to get to our destination...yes, we are driving my car, late as usual. Now, it seems every time we are in this situation, I refuse to take my wife's suggestion to stop and ask for direction....thus, every time, we are late.
So I have decided to change all that...which part is the frame of reference 1st? and which part is the working of the mind 2nd?
Admitting wanting to change is the first part of changing the mind or are you considering that the frame of reference?
"Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." --- "Therefore, I Believe it and I will see it. And every day and in every way, I am healthier, wealthier, and wiser."
You know what rtrade, most comments are written quickly and i think it's very difficult to express what we really think in a few written words. My first language is french so although not an excuse most of the time i write in a very telegraphic manner. But other members here have said it very well before me and i think it's worth mentioning again, Mike has already said what i believe to be true and much better than i could ever do here. If you can practice what he wrote there than you should be able to change in a positive manner. Have a nice weekend.