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Thanks for this great thread. I have come to the conclusion that anxiety is part of trading and I have to live with it. I have been in this business part time for about 7 years and recently going full time, but I am never comfortable while I am in any trade, winning or losing. The key is to recognize it and make sure you manage it so it doesn't cloud decision making.
I think a lot of anxiety and frustration comes from doing too much and expecting too much from the market. This results in over-trading, which leads to bad decision making and typically ends up in a downward spiral or constant spinning of the wheels. It took a long time for me to realize you can only extract so much from the market trading 1 contract. If you push it, performance decreases.
I am not saying one should scalp for small targets, it is far from it. But, the real money is made by trading bigger size with reasonable targets, trading less and making high quality decisions. Once you see cash flow on some consistent basis, it improves your confidence, and you can manage anxiety better. Less is more is a good motto for tackling anxiety.
Thanks @rahulgopi for sharing your insights. You reached out to me early on in my trading career and I appreciate it. I'm certainly not the only one here to benefit from your thoughtful posts.
Over the last few years, I've come to the conclusion that edge, while not easily obtained, is not the only hurdle to overcome. Once we have it, we have to contend with ourselves. There's nobody else to blame if it doesn't work out.
I write little thoughts down as I am trading...these days they focus mostly around allowing trading to be my "Zen space"...a name I borrowed from Rahulgopi that in itself doesn't mean much to me. I simply mean peaceful, happy and focused. When I find myself getting agitated (like today) I take time to ask myself why. I've heard people use the phrase "emotional capital"...something that we can lose along with our money. After an intense hour or two we can feel totally drained and sometimes pretty much useless for hours later. I've had many days like that.
These days are the most Zen days trading days I've ever had...and I was sitting on my back deck just now (my other Zen space) and pondering a comparison between the two. I sit, sipping coffee and watch the gentle breeze rustling the branches of the beautiful trees out there, feel that breeze on my face and I can sense my whole being unwinding and soaking in the beauty. And I asked myself "can trading be THIS chill?"...Is that possible?
And in that moment I realized a piece of the puzzle about why things are different these days. I have simply decided lately that I am going to see watching the markets as part of my relaxing time in a day. Time for rejuvenation and enjoyment...it's quiet, cool and all I am really doing is taking in the view. And so, when in a trade that I am feeling anxious about I ask myself "are you really gonna sell this peaceful moment for a little bit of money?". Are you really telling me that you can't enjoy this time because there is money on the line? And the idea of trading that peace for money breaks the circuit somehow because I am absolutely NOT willing to sell my enjoyment of life in ANY moment for money...that is a lesson I learned long ago.
As I pondered I thought of this thread and thought I would contribute this in case it helps anyone.
Craig
Until you make the Unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it Fate...
What an awesome way to view trading. I thought about this today. Trading is also my happy place, but I get really uptight at times about the struggle.
For me, I am looking to both grow to take on more uncomfortable challenges while at the same time trying to stay in a peaceful mind-set. Thanks for posting this @Blue Eagle.
@rahulgopi, I thought for some time about this one in particular:
After thinking, there are many facets of the video I agree with.
I think for me, it breaks down into the fundamental problem of "how do I want to spend my time here on earth?"
Do I want to settle and find a comfortable way of life that is 'good-enough'...or do I want to use my time to take on greater challenges
that bring me joy and can potentially lead to things like 1) not having to answer to somebody else, 2) having to spend my limited time working on someone else's vision and goals, or 3) be numb on a salary which may be comfortable but is also limiting in other ways.
Note that obviously there is nothing wrong with having a salary and benefits, for some the career they have earned is the goal. For others, they may feel like they are settling in their particular field or they may have different goals altogether so its different person to person.
Another point I took away from this video was when we are failing and feeling vulnerable about something that is very important to us, we tend to avoid feeling threatened by engaging in mind-numbing pleasures. My take-away is to learn to better notice when I'm feeling like I've failed and instead of avoiding it, I should embrace the feeling and work on how to fix the underlying problem. This isn't necessarily new information as we know that avoiding underlying issues does not make them go away, but I think of how many Friday evenings where I felt like life was kicking me in the ass that week even though I'd worked as hard as I could, and I would just think "I deserve a drink", and instead, should have dusted myself off and worked at my craft. This isn't to say we shouldn't let ourselves unwind when we need a break from life, but constantly avoiding the underlying issue will ultimately lead you nowhere, so that is what inspires me to put the work in.
Great resources, and thanks again for sharing @rahulgopi!
Jared did a webinar here a few days ago. I have found this to be maybe the best book I've ever read on trading (and I have read well over one hundred books).
A big source of anxiety for me is being unsure of what to focus on to take the next few steps forward on my trading journey. Finding this to be an Excellent read that is very pertinent to my current struggles:
I would echo some of the earlier sentiments about mindfulness.
People try to compartmentalize their lives, and think they can keep trading in its own box. But how you live your life manifests in your trading. You can't live a life of complexity and stress and distraction and expect to be calm and focussed at the trading screen.
There's that phrase: "how you do anything is how you do everything". Remembering this has helped me a lot with trying to create excellence, not just in trading but in life.