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My Journey to Psychological and Physical Health


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My Journey to Psychological and Physical Health

  #21 (permalink)
 
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 ZTR 
 
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So I had to hit myself hard with pain meds yesterday. Had too much fun. Played GT five for about 30 minutes and my arms and hands hurt so bad.

Which is why I'm up so early.

Did this in Sim last night. Can't wait to be off the pain meds. Fell asleep right after Brian Wilson came to save the game.
This is the first time since the Giants went to the World Series that they've had an offense; combine that with killer pitching...

Going to see the Giants play today, will be knocking off really early.

Day games are my favorite, especially in the heart of winter in San Francisco i.e. summer.

R.I.P. Andy Zektzer (ZTR), 1960-2010.
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  #22 (permalink)
 
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 ZTR 
 
Experience: Advanced
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So instead of spending the day trading my YM 2 car system, had to spend the day on Health issues.

Earlier in the week was interviewed by a critical care specialist.

Oooooh! that sounds good. A real specialist who know about transplants and is going to help me. My doc said watch out, why I wondered?

While a seemingly nice person, this person has an awful job. I likened it to George Cloony in Up in the Air. In this movie Cloony play a hired-gun who does corporate downsizing. Well my insurance hired an outside company & I was not of the impressions that someone was sent to help me, they were there to find a way to deign me coverage. The rep does not think this is the job, but that is the reality.

This person knew nothing about transplants, then why are you even here? I asked.

I terminated the interaction.

This company let me get sicker and sicker over a few thousand $$$ 2 years ago and now they are concerned? BS!

It was like being in a John Grisham novel. The one where the guy dies after the insurance company denigned coverage, although they should not have.

I need pain management, but they have refused for 4 months (about) but approved physical thearapy? What! I am writhing in pain when I put on my shoes some days they want to make me stretch? I tried that last week and paid for it, by having to up my pain meds. I am still paying for it today.

See my Journal, I managed only 3 trades. Should have made more, but was so upset after dealing with all of this nonsense I just watched the market with @Zondor and argued about who's method is better the zondorific (Nick-Named that by @aztrader9) system or my DOM/Ladder/RealStats system.

R.I.P. Andy Zektzer (ZTR), 1960-2010.
Please visit this thread for more information.
Visit my NexusFi Trade Journal Started this thread
  #23 (permalink)
 syxforex 
British Columbia
 
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That's not good to hear Andy... it sounds like you have the worst health insurance company on the planet. can you sue them, take them to the high court, is there anything you can do that way? You suffer immense pain at times almost every day. I can't imagine being you being told that you don't qualify for pain treatment. It's terribly wrong. And it's the main problem in the world today, all powerful corporations in control... it's your medical care versus their EPS and executive bonuses... I'd write the CEO and let him know first had where his seven figure bonus is coming from this year, scumbags...

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  #24 (permalink)
 
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..........

R.I.P. Andy Zektzer (ZTR), 1960-2010.
Please visit this thread for more information.
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  #25 (permalink)
 
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 ZTR 
 
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ZTR View Post
I was sent home with diluadid (super-morphine) plus methadone (used to wean heroin addicts) & Baclofen. They said I get to see a pain specialist, and my further treatment will be covered, by UCSF. Still won't stop me from seeing a lawyer.

I expect to be wasted for quite a while. This was all avoidable with timely treatment. Insurance driven medicine cripples yet another one.

This was Mid-July. Next Friday I finally get to see a pain specailist, I had to threaten to sue to get this.

Said it before will say it now: Insurance driven medicine cripples yet another one!

R.I.P. Andy Zektzer (ZTR), 1960-2010.
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  #26 (permalink)
 
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 George 
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Don't think of pink Elephants!!!

What did you think of?!

Pink elephants right?!



The mind, the mind, the mind! It's main function is to protect us. But you see sometimes, we think that it should better shut up and let us do our thing! But still it gains every war against it!

Ever since I was a kid, I've always (and I guess this is somehow my construction) done things the other way around! I've always gone against the crowd. It's like taking a leek against the wind. You always get wet!
But you know what I've discovered?! That these drops contains a very big essence of truth. And please forgive my analogy! The truth lies always in that part that is behind the scene, on the blind side, where very few people have gone and discovered!

Do you guys believe in God/Buddha/Allah?! I myself believe in the Universe! I believe in chi! I believe that there's an energetic essence to life! I believe in what the ancients called the WEB of creation. I believe that this web of creation holds everything together! Science is starting slowly to recognize this, well call it phenomena!

Einstein said that Energy=Matter! Science has found that if you zoom into an atom, all you'll find is emptiness formed by photons (light particles). So if we assume that everything is energy held together by a web. Then it means that our thoughts have a big part in this equation!

So, speaking of thoughts! Have you heard of the saying, that what you put out you get back?! Or, picture a mirror in front of you, and ask yourself : How would you make the mirror smile at you?

Simple one right?! You smile, and what you get back is the reflection of your smile, projected back to you from the mirror.

Well, my friends that's my explanation of how life works!


There is a study done on prayer, and how to use it as a tool! The most interesting part is the one that talks about the three most common prayers that people pray for!
1. Money
2. Health
3. Happiness

Remember the mirror? Well it works the same with prayer! Imagine you pray for money. When do you do that?
When you lack it right? And what do send into the mirror? That you don't have any, or enough, and that you want money! Ironically enough, you get more lack!

Change it to health. We only pray when we lack good health. And what do say to the mirror? Please make me healthy, and you do that because your mind is only creative!

Meaning?!; meaning that our mind projects into "the mirror" or into the future, only what it knows and what is has in its registry (archive)!

You see, that why the truth, lies in the "wind"!


In order to make the mirror smile, you have to smile at it! In order to get the money, you have to send the money! You can't be looking at the mirror being sad, and hope that it will smile back at you!

Unfortunately, most of us live our lives by the latter!; hoping that the mirror will smile back at us without smiling at it!



And when it doesn't, we start chasing for success, for tools, for methods! And where do we start the search?!
By looking at others, and how they've done it in order to achieve the success! And if that weren't enough, we pick out the ones that are in the right frame of success. And that frame is normally set by society!

Why?! Because our mind is only creative! We've being brought up, ever since we were small kids, to think that we're helpless and dependent!
You may not piss against the wind!

Why? Why? Why? do you guys not take a look inside, and ask yourselves! What the hell is wrong with me? And why can't I be successful of what I'm doing? Why don't you listen to the answers that you get?

I learned (by reading books, and listening to others) for many years, that I have to love what I am doing, in order to be successful! So I started to LOVE trading! And believe me I loved it to death!, and I loved it, and I loved it! Did that make successful? NO!

Did I listen to my inner thoughts? NO! Why?! Because it scared the hell out of me! If I were to listen to what my thought s told me about trading, then I would start to hate it! And if I'd do that, then I'd never become successful!

When, I started to accept that I didn't' love it, then I started to become free. Free from all those:

you have to have ....... (fill in the blank) in order to be successful!

And I started to ACCEPT, that trading is the most boring thing that there is out there (I mean, let's face it, who the hell would call that fun! you sit in front of a screen for several hours a day, and sometimes you even have to pay in order to do that). And by accepting that, I started to create more space and it allowed me to concentrate on what I needed to improve in order to adapt trading to my main goal!

Main goal?! To trade as little as possible, as good as possible, in order to get more fun to do what I really love to do, and to be able to function as an independent person that is not dependent on the frames that society has implied upon us!


Now, I'm not saying that coaches, books, friends and everything else is bad! But I'm just trying to say that we should look for the answers inside ourselves and to stop searching for successful story's outside ourselves!


And in my mirror, I see you well and healthy Andy!

We all struggle to make tomorrow look like yesterday!
Get rid of your past and let the future unfold from the now.
Past performance is not indicative of future results.
/George
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  #27 (permalink)
 
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 Fat Tails 
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George, thank you for your post, really enjoyed reading it.

Pink elephants no, but I remember a pink panther.

I forgive you the story with the photons inside the atoms, because the atoms won't be offended either. Science will nothing recognize of what you said. Science builds models on empirical data, and there are things that cannot be caught with models.

The models we create of the world - well, including models of God, Buddha or Allah - only teach us something about ourselves, but not about the world. The models are limited by our way of perceiving things and building models.

We cannot escape the bias of our limitations. This is not the Heisenberg problem, which states that you cannot observe something without changing it. It is simply our subjectivity and simple-mindedness, which makes us incapable of grasping the essentials.

I like your citing the mirror. The mirror stands for self-awareness. Religion is a mirror of our needs, and a God is something we have created to reduce the pain of watching what we see. Simba does not need any religion. If he looks into the mirror he will see another dog or bat.

What are we seeing when looking into the mirrror? The picture is biased, as the models scientists are building are biased by their way of constructing them. Science comes up with peculiar concepts such as circles, lines. Does a circle really exist? Does a line exist? No, they don't. Just products of our imagination and helping us to put that complex stuff into our simple mind.

A telephone directory contains more information than a book of poems. Why? The information is uncorrelated. But our human nature attracts us to the poems, as we find beauty and analogy, as our mind requires.

Remember the answer of a Thai king, who visited France and listened to a concert, and then was asked, which of the performed compositions he liked best. The first, he answered, referring to the tuning up of the instruments.

I think we are not aware to what extent our thinking and behaviour is based on bias and heuristic, how our judgement is influenced by limitations and ahbits.

All this sounds like trading. Trading is boring as you said, Goerge, but it is a metaphor for life. All the creatures that you will encounter in real life, the religions, the beliefs, you find them between your charts and the traders that put those beliefs in applciation. Every day your mind plays tricks with you, and if you don't have rules to cope these tricks, the hundreds of Fata Morganas - just another type of mirror images - will lead you into the desert, where you will end up on the trader's cemetery.

Andy, I also believe in you, and my mirror, reflecting my wishes, sees you up and running for new adventures. Go for it.

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  #28 (permalink)
 
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 ZTR 
 
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After talking with @Big Mike we decided it's best if I step down as moderator.

Really enjoyed my time here & will still keep posting on the forum, but keeping up with the number of posts I was reading each day, trying to organize downloads and keeping this forum friendly, was just too much, right now.

Getting my health back in order is the number one priority. For the first time in 30 months I feel it's possible. Even the cramping helps; I almost have a six pack again, abs I mean. Crazy, but I have learned to look on the positive side of things. I feel like my body is a racecar that just needs some track time to get everything tuned up.

I want to say thanks to @George for his kind words and outlook. He has an interesting perspective that is very close to my own on how things work.

@George shared this with me. He recently discovered this mind game:

[George] I want to share with you. Have some fun with it.

Pick out a belief you have in your mind (belief system) and ask yourself these set of questions. Remember to be true to yourself.

A belief would be something like " I believe I cannot stop smoking"! By the way it works on every belief you have!

1. What would I have to believe it's true in order to react to this (the belief), this way?
(Find out the answer, and move to the next question)
2. Where does this belief come from?
(Find out where it comes from, and go to the next question)
3. Does this belief serve me anymore?
(Ask that, get the answer and move to the next question)
4. What belief can replace that one?
(That one meaning the old belief)

That's it! Have some fun with it and be true to yourself. And remember that we can only have 1 belief per system, meaning that as soon as the old belief is identified and accepted, then space is created for the new belief that is replacing the old one!

[/George]

Akin to this I use something called The Secret. I highly recommend it. It is a way of putting your goals in your mind so that you're constantly looking for things that satisfy them. It is a stress-free way of improving yourself.

I'll be starting physical therapy next week and am visualizing what I'll be able to do. That's important. Visualize positive things are going to happen, and your subconscious will work for you all the time without any effort to help you achieve what you visualize.

So the goal is to do the workout I posted downloads. I have the rest of my life to accomplish this. As with any large goal break it down into tiny little pieces that you can manage that don't seem insurmountable. Once you learn how to do this & have a positive attitude you can accomplish great things with seemingly no mental effort, except a little perspiration. As Edison once said invention is 10% inspiration and 90% perspiration. So you have to be willing to put in the time and work to accomplish anything. But it is certainly a lot easier once you train your mind to help, rather than get in the way.

I'm working on my trading system and visualizing myself executing it with precision. Now it's just a matter of getting in shape physically and managing the meds necessary to keep me healthy. Once I'm feeling better I'll start posting again.

Longer term I plan on getting a motorcycle and traveling around the world like Jim Rodgers did in Investment Biker. This sound more fun than my plan to move to Italy, I decided that San Francisco needs to be my base. It is just too beautiful to leave for more than a few months at a time.

Thanks to everyone here, you made this a great experience.

BTW: @Fat Tails, and @aztrader9, I want to give you a contest on getting thanks. But it will be a few weeks, before I am up to it.

ZTR

R.I.P. Andy Zektzer (ZTR), 1960-2010.
Please visit this thread for more information.
Visit my NexusFi Trade Journal Started this thread
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  #29 (permalink)
 
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 ZTR 
 
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I believe there are two simplistic ways to describe traders.
Those who want their model of the world verified.
Those who seek the truth.

Model the worlders are very rigid. They like to be right, they like to win arguments. How can you identify one ?

They'll say there is nothing you can say that will make me change my mind.

Seekers of truth are open-minded they accept any new information as something to be contemplated. Whether they agree with it or not, at least they consider it.

So here is a test which way can you make the ballerina spin?

Right Brain v Left Brain | Herald Sun

I consistently can make her spin either direction. Figure out which of the two above fits your mindset.

If you like this post please give thanks.
I am in a friendly competition with @ aztrader9 & @ Fat Tails.
Help me out?

R.I.P. Andy Zektzer (ZTR), 1960-2010.
Please visit this thread for more information.
Visit my NexusFi Trade Journal Started this thread
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  #30 (permalink)
 
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 Fat Tails 
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ZTR View Post

So here is a test which way can you make the ballerina spin?

Right Brain v Left Brain | Herald Sun

I consistently can make her spin either direction. Figure out which of the two above fits your mindset.

If you like this post please give thanks.
I am in a friendly competition with @ aztrader9 & @ Fat Tails.
Help me out?

It is easy to achieve consistence here: Decide whether the girl should be spinning clockwise or counter-clockwise. Then look at a point below her feet. When you look up again she follows the direction you imagine. Just need to disconnect your brain from the moving image to allow for a change. This is just another type of anchoring.

The problem is the same as in trading. I need to overcome anchoring to achieve consistency. A stop-loss that has been triggered removes the bias created by my position. After the stop-loss has been triggered, I am free again to consider all three options available. Going short, going long or doing nothing.

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