Support from wife/kids/loved ones in your trading - Psychology and Money Management | futures io social day trading
futures io futures trading


Support from wife/kids/loved ones in your trading
Updated: Views / Replies:26,288 / 190
Created: by Big Mike Attachments:3

Welcome to futures io.

(If you already have an account, login at the top of the page)

futures io is the largest futures trading community on the planet, with over 90,000 members. At futures io, our goal has always been and always will be to create a friendly, positive, forward-thinking community where members can openly share and discuss everything the world of trading has to offer. The community is one of the friendliest you will find on any subject, with members going out of their way to help others. Some of the primary differences between futures io and other trading sites revolve around the standards of our community. Those standards include a code of conduct for our members, as well as extremely high standards that govern which partners we do business with, and which products or services we recommend to our members.

At futures io, our focus is on quality education. No hype, gimmicks, or secret sauce. The truth is: trading is hard. To succeed, you need to surround yourself with the right support system, educational content, and trading mentors – all of which you can find on futures io, utilizing our social trading environment.

With futures io, you can find honest trading reviews on brokers, trading rooms, indicator packages, trading strategies, and much more. Our trading review process is highly moderated to ensure that only genuine users are allowed, so you don’t need to worry about fake reviews.

We are fundamentally different than most other trading sites:
  • We are here to help. Just let us know what you need.
  • We work extremely hard to keep things positive in our community.
  • We do not tolerate rude behavior, trolling, or vendors advertising in posts.
  • We firmly believe in and encourage sharing. The holy grail is within you, we can help you find it.
  • We expect our members to participate and become a part of the community. Help yourself by helping others.

You'll need to register in order to view the content of the threads and start contributing to our community.  It's free and simple.

-- Big Mike, Site Administrator

Reply
 3  
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
 

Support from wife/kids/loved ones in your trading

  #61 (permalink)
Elite Member
Hradec Kralove, Czech republic
 
Futures Experience: Beginner
Platform: NintaTrader 7
Favorite Futures: FGBL, ZB, ZN
 
gerimo's Avatar
 
Posts: 89 since Apr 2010
Thanks: 11 given, 59 received


Baseheadz View Post
I don't recommend that every trader goes to Gamblers Anonymous, BUT I do recommend that almost every daytrader goes to Gambler's anonymous at least for a couple of times to hear stories about how these people have totally ruined their lives. It's quite entertaining.

Interesting... good point, I look for it in my town...

Thank you.

Reply With Quote
 
  #62 (permalink)
Membership Permanently Revoked
 
Futures Experience: Intermediate
 
Posts: 1,176 since Nov 2009
Thanks: 221 given, 844 received


gerimo View Post
I am in learning phase... now i am finishing my system, and preparing for papertrading. I am with markets only 1,5 year and lost $ 347 (at the beginning i was rush and after this lost (this lost was after month and many mistakes) i realized, that trading is not so easy). So i think, that i am not gambler...

perhaps you are looking at it the wrong way... specially if you are not yet really trading but still learning ... first, why dont you see if you understand why she gave you that ultimatum... is it because you are spending lots of time in front of a screen and not paying attention to her? is it because you are spending the rent money on the trading effort? find out from her what is making her give you that ultimatum, dont guess at it. Once you know, it is easier to figure out how to make a compromise and keep both...

if you are spending every hour online trading, then there is something wrong... and you should look at that... you might need to learn some time management and ensure to schedule your trading efforts when she is not around so there is no conflict for attention... women are simple, yet complicated, it is all about them and what they want.. which makes them rather easy to manipulate.. same thing for man, we are simple and we are all about ourselves, which is why woman find it so easy to manipulate as well.. so understand where the friction comes from and deflect or work around it..

there is always the option to find someone else... or just tell her no, it is the way it is... but I dont think that will end up the right way since she is not married to you or anything like that and can replace you quite easily..

it would all also be a different story if you were making money off the trading, then you could ask her if she wanted to give up whatever you were obtaining with the trading money and that would be the end of it..

oh, dont make the mistake that some might make to get her involve... she might turn out to understand things better than you and be a better trader than you... and if your ego can tolerate that, the relationship will pretty much be over... not many man can tolerate competition from their woman...

that is how I would proceed in any event, understand the issue at hand first, find the source, and address it..

Reply With Quote
The following 2 users say Thank You to sysot1t for this post:
 
  #63 (permalink)
Membership Permanently Revoked
 
Futures Experience: Intermediate
 
Posts: 1,176 since Nov 2009
Thanks: 221 given, 844 received



Baseheadz View Post
It's quite entertaining.

I am not sure I get the entertaining part of the experience of a gambling adict... that would be like saying that a cancer survivor support group member experience is entertaining... which to me is rather short sighted and close minded ... if I was to show up to a group of any kind that would be relating their experiences, it would be to learn from their mistakes and to recognize the signs of trouble... not to "entertain" myself... for that I would go to vegas and gamble or go to a firing range and fire a few shots at a few targets..

Reply With Quote
The following 3 users say Thank You to sysot1t for this post:
 
  #64 (permalink)
Site Administrator
Manta, Ecuador
 
Futures Experience: Advanced
Platform: My own custom solution
Favorite Futures: E-mini ES S&P 500
 
Big Mike's Avatar
 
Posts: 46,238 since Jun 2009
Thanks: 29,350 given, 83,220 received

I agree, entertaining is not the word. Enlightening is more accurate.

Mike

Due to time constraints, please do not PM me if your question can be resolved or answered on the forum.

Need help?
1) Stop changing things. No new indicators, charts, or methods. Be consistent with what is in front of you first.
2) Start a journal and post to it daily with the trades you made to show your strengths and weaknesses.
3) Set goals for yourself to reach daily. Make them about how you trade, not how much money you make.
4) Accept responsibility for your actions. Stop looking elsewhere to explain away poor performance.
5) Where to start as a trader? Watch this webinar and read this thread for hundreds of questions and answers.
6)
Help using the forum? Watch this video to learn general tips on using the site.

If you want
to support our community, become an Elite Member.

Reply With Quote
 
  #65 (permalink)
Elite Member
Hradec Kralove, Czech republic
 
Futures Experience: Beginner
Platform: NintaTrader 7
Favorite Futures: FGBL, ZB, ZN
 
gerimo's Avatar
 
Posts: 89 since Apr 2010
Thanks: 11 given, 59 received

Thank you for your responses. Very useful see other angle of view. The core problem I see in paying attention. We see each other mainly in weekends (we are living 40 km apart). She is studying at university and I have a job, so common living is not possible yet. I should make some compromises, if she approach on that. Maybe she is just despair, and give me ultimatum...

Once again, thank you for other view. Now it is up to me.

Reply With Quote
 
  #66 (permalink)
Membership Permanently Revoked
hartford
 
Futures Experience: Intermediate
Platform: nt
Favorite Futures: cl
 
Posts: 52 since Jun 2011
Thanks: 54 given, 5 received

good article on addiction from MSNBC today.



updated 8/15/2011 1:15:01 PM ET 2011-08-15T17:15:01
Addiction is a chronic brain disorder and not simply a behavior problem involving alcohol, drugs, gambling or sex, experts contend in a new definition of addiction, one that is not solely related to problematic substance abuse.

The American Society of Addiction Medicine (ASAM) just released this new definition of addiction after a four-year process involving more than 80 experts.1.

its core, addiction isn't just a social problem or a moral problem or a criminal problem. It's a brain problem whose behaviors manifest in all these other areas," said Dr. Michael Miller, past president of ASAM who oversaw the development of the new definition. "Many behaviors driven by addiction are real problems and sometimes criminal acts. But the disease is about brains, not drugs. It's about underlying neurology, not outward actions."

The new definition also describes addiction as a primary disease, meaning that it's not the result of other causes, such as emotional or psychiatric problems. And like cardiovascular disease and diabetes, addiction is recognized as a chronic disease; so it must be treated, managed and monitored over a person's lifetime, the researchers say.
Two decades of advancements in neuroscience convinced ASAM officials that addiction should be redefined by what's going on in the brain. For instance, research has shown that addiction affects the brain's reward circuitry, such that memories of previous experiences with food, sex, alcohol and other drugs trigger cravings and more addictive behaviors. Brain circuitry that governs impulse control and judgment is also altered in the brains of addicts, resulting in the nonsensical pursuit of "rewards," such as alcohol and other drugs.
A long-standing debate has roiled over whether addicts have a choice over their behaviors, said Dr. Raju Hajela, former president of the Canadian Society of Addiction Medicine and chair of the ASAM committee on addiction's new definition.
"The disease creates distortions in thinking, feelings and perceptions, which drive people to behave in ways that are not understandable to others around them," Hajela said in a statement. "Simply put, addiction is not a choice. Addictive behaviors are a manifestation of the disease, not a cause."



Even so, Hajela pointed out, choice does play a role in getting help.
"Because there is no pill which alone can cure addiction, choosing recovery over unhealthy behaviors is necessary," Hajela said.
This "choosing recovery" is akin to people with heart disease who may not choose the underlying genetic causes of their heart problems but do need to choose to eat healthier or begin exercising, in addition to medical or surgical interventions, the researchers said.
"So, we have to stop moralizing, blaming, controlling or smirking at the person with the disease of addiction, and start creating opportunities for individuals and families to get help and providing assistance in choosing proper treatment," Miller said.

Reply With Quote
 
  #67 (permalink)
Membership Permanently Revoked
 
Futures Experience: Intermediate
 
Posts: 1,176 since Nov 2009
Thanks: 221 given, 844 received


gerimo View Post
Thank you for your responses. Very useful see other angle of view. The core problem I see in paying attention. We see each other mainly in weekends (we are living 40 km apart). She is studying at university and I have a job, so common living is not possible yet. I should make some compromises, if she approach on that. Maybe she is just despair, and give me ultimatum...

Once again, thank you for other view. Now it is up to me.

her a student and you have a job... easy to handle... some advice.. take it as you will.. ... not perfect advise, just drawing from my own experience, nothing more.

1) send her flowers, or teddies, or chocolates, etc... sporadically but scheduled (the scheduled part is so that you dont forget, but make it randomly really, setup your computer to generate ramdon alerts for you to send them) women love to receive presents.. and to showcase in front of her friends, so find out her class schedule and send it to her when she is in class... let her know you are thinking of her... that will score major points (and get you L**d) she will then be getting attention from all angles.

2) when you do see her, dont even look at a computer or even talk about trading... cook for her or take her somewhere on a picnic (whatever is cost effective, aka cheap).. and engage her on conversation that is about her.. keep her talking about her issues and challenges and listen and suggest, etc..

3) f*** her brains out when she comes around (assuming that you are having a sexual relationship of course, no offense intended with that suggestion) ... make her know that she has been missed, if you know what I mean.

those few things alone, will eliminate your problem.... guaranteed...


Last edited by sysot1t; August 15th, 2011 at 06:09 PM.
Reply With Quote
 
  #68 (permalink)
Membership Permanently Revoked
 
Futures Experience: Intermediate
 
Posts: 1,176 since Nov 2009
Thanks: 221 given, 844 received

with all due respect to the "experts" ... addiction is not a disease... it has to do with a weak mind and character..

an addict finds fullfillment on their addiction because something else is amiss in their lives.. and as such they seek escape on that addiction... cigarretes, drugs, alcohol, gambling,sex, etc... they all try to address our needs differently.. many alter our brains chemically, and as such we chase the feeling to escape... usually the part that is missed is the whole: we are trying to escape, we will chase what makes us feel better, and because we want to continue to escape rather than fixing the source, we become adicted to chasing what makes us feel better.

addiction is very much a choice that a human makes over time to give into their desire to escape from their reality and rather accept their "new" reality... in which they are happy.. even if that in fact is short lived and it destroys them...

I am not an addict, but I have seen plenty of people who are and it all comes down to their character and what they are addressing internally (emotional/psychologically).. nothing more, or less...

society just seems to like excusing their members...



shah1266 View Post
good article on addiction from MSNBC today.



updated 8/15/2011 1:15:01 PM ET 2011-08-15T17:15:01
Addiction is a chronic brain disorder and not simply a behavior problem involving alcohol, drugs, gambling or sex, experts contend in a new definition of addiction, one that is not solely related to problematic substance abuse.

The American Society of Addiction Medicine (ASAM) just released this new definition of addiction after a four-year process involving more than 80 experts.1.

its core, addiction isn't just a social problem or a moral problem or a criminal problem. It's a brain problem whose behaviors manifest in all these other areas," said Dr. Michael Miller, past president of ASAM who oversaw the development of the new definition. "Many behaviors driven by addiction are real problems and sometimes criminal acts. But the disease is about brains, not drugs. It's about underlying neurology, not outward actions."

The new definition also describes addiction as a primary disease, meaning that it's not the result of other causes, such as emotional or psychiatric problems. And like cardiovascular disease and diabetes, addiction is recognized as a chronic disease; so it must be treated, managed and monitored over a person's lifetime, the researchers say.
Two decades of advancements in neuroscience convinced ASAM officials that addiction should be redefined by what's going on in the brain. For instance, research has shown that addiction affects the brain's reward circuitry, such that memories of previous experiences with food, sex, alcohol and other drugs trigger cravings and more addictive behaviors. Brain circuitry that governs impulse control and judgment is also altered in the brains of addicts, resulting in the nonsensical pursuit of "rewards," such as alcohol and other drugs.
A long-standing debate has roiled over whether addicts have a choice over their behaviors, said Dr. Raju Hajela, former president of the Canadian Society of Addiction Medicine and chair of the ASAM committee on addiction's new definition.
"The disease creates distortions in thinking, feelings and perceptions, which drive people to behave in ways that are not understandable to others around them," Hajela said in a statement. "Simply put, addiction is not a choice. Addictive behaviors are a manifestation of the disease, not a cause."



Even so, Hajela pointed out, choice does play a role in getting help.
"Because there is no pill which alone can cure addiction, choosing recovery over unhealthy behaviors is necessary," Hajela said.
This "choosing recovery" is akin to people with heart disease who may not choose the underlying genetic causes of their heart problems but do need to choose to eat healthier or begin exercising, in addition to medical or surgical interventions, the researchers said.
"So, we have to stop moralizing, blaming, controlling or smirking at the person with the disease of addiction, and start creating opportunities for individuals and families to get help and providing assistance in choosing proper treatment," Miller said.



Last edited by sysot1t; August 15th, 2011 at 10:44 PM.
Reply With Quote
The following user says Thank You to sysot1t for this post:
 
  #69 (permalink)
Membership Permanently Revoked
hartford
 
Futures Experience: Intermediate
Platform: nt
Favorite Futures: cl
 
Posts: 52 since Jun 2011
Thanks: 54 given, 5 received

I agree in part systot,they are replacing something in their lives with these addictions but that does play into their chemical balance issues. As the 'high' does affect their chemical makup in their brains. Alot of drugs like Prozac affect the neurotrasmittor levels as helpful in increasing serotonin or norepi instead of the person looking for that high through those activities. I think the moral/weak will was used soley as the basis for addiction in days past,not so much anymore. Though I think it takes both. Cheers

Reply With Quote
The following user says Thank You to shah1266 for this post:
 
  #70 (permalink)
Elite Member
NC, USA
 
Futures Experience: None
Platform: None Yet
Favorite Futures: Guitar
 
MrYou's Avatar
 
Posts: 403 since Jun 2011
Thanks: 618 given, 193 received


sysot1t, physical and psychological addiction are very real and expecting people to "just quit" is ignorant and naive. Now whether their "character", as you put it, determine their choices is another argument, but I think lifes choices are much more complicated than that.

Unfortunately people want simple black and white solutions, but this isn't reality.

Reply With Quote
The following user says Thank You to MrYou for this post:

Reply



futures io > > > Support from wife/kids/loved ones in your trading

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search



Upcoming Webinars and Events (4:30PM ET unless noted)

Linda Bradford Raschke: Reading The Tape

Elite only

Adam Grimes: TBA

Elite only

NinjaTrader: TBA

January

Ran Aroussi: TBA

Elite only
     

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Trading Chair with Lumbar Support? vk79 Off-Topic 102 July 14th, 2017 11:41 AM
Trading Support and Resistance shodson The Elite Circle 21 December 7th, 2011 10:13 AM
Anne Sinclair, Former IMF Chief's Wife, Stands By Her Man Quick Summary News and Current Events 0 May 21st, 2011 02:20 PM
Pros and Cons of Giving Your Kids Financial Independence Quick Summary News and Current Events 1 February 13th, 2011 07:37 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 01:46 AM.

Copyright © 2017 by futures io, s.a., Av Ricardo J. Alfaro, Century Tower, Panama, +507 833-9432, info@futures.io
All information is for educational use only and is not investment advice.
There is a substantial risk of loss in trading commodity futures, stocks, options and foreign exchange products. Past performance is not indicative of future results.
no new posts
Page generated 2017-12-13 in 0.08 seconds with 19 queries on phoenix via your IP 54.92.201.232