the snag talking to others about trading the market who are not traders , is trading is an learned experience , unless someone else has experienced what it is to trade , there's nothing to talk about , , with out expressed experience , how can others support what a trader does ?
those on the outside only have 2 question's they would like to know , how much $$$$ is made or lost and or show me how
A couple of recent posts from @GaryD and @tderrick made me wonder if these two guys would mind sharing more about how their wife views their trading.
Are they actively involved? Do they take an interest? Do they just want a reliable check?
Have they ever traded on their own, to see how hard it is?
Do you guys ever fight about trading?
Sorry for being nosy, I am a bit jealous in this regard as I have no spouse (just my dogs!) and just wonder what you guys are going through.
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I met her at a club in Ft Walton Beach FL. She was waiting tables and I was running sound for a rock band.
We (the band) were on the South Eastern Rock club circuit in the 80's... well you can imagine... I was about as free as a man could be. We were like nomads.
Nancy has always been a "Saver".... birds, squirrels, dogs.. whatever. She took one look at me and
knew I needed "Saving" ... not in the religious sense mind you.
She "ensnared" me by breaking a glass next to me and she fell for me when I helped her clean it up. !!
It took me much longer to fall, as I simply was not looking. I slowly changed as we started dating.
The rest is history.
When I said I wanted to go Nashville during the Garth Brooks boom, to be a recording engineer, she
never flinched. We loaded up a Ryder truck and hit the road. Me, her and two dogs in the front of that
She supported us for the first year waiting tables as I beat the pavement around Nashville looking for that
door to open... Taking the odd live sound gig here and there. But always "having big fun"!!
So, to the present. I have been engineering music for 22 years now. Good pay when it comes.
Being self employed only works if you are doing what you love. The future is always in doubt. But, then
I have always lived like that.
So, to my wife, trading is nothing. We have been through so much together, this is just the next phase.
I will show her some trading stuff and she will politely sit and try to understand, but it truly is rocket science
to most, as I explain support and resistance and how I can deduce if price does this, it will probably do this.
She see's the potential and seem's genuinely excited. She also understands when I say when I trade live
money, my mind works differently. Exactly how I used to blank out when I was first engineering. Trial by fire
is the only cure. Then she understands. It is just a matter of time before I can trade and make all the money
we need. We will then just sit on the porch and watch the horses on the farm.
We will go to the grave together. True soul mates and critter lovers.
and 1 cat.
All "saved" ... just like me.
"Life On The Edge of SR"
The following 17 users say Thank You to tderrick for this post:
I asked my wife tonight what she thought of my trading. To be honest I don't think I have ever asked before. She said "Its your passion what you love to do. I totally support it and would never keep you away from what you love to do. But there have been times you get so involved that you fail to see the world around you. That's when I have to drag you back to reality.. " She knows someday I will go full time trading. She understands all to well the mortality rate of trading accounts. This scares her a little. I don't blame her there. With my day job I get a steady check but with trading you never know.
We have never had a fight about trading and she has no interest in learning. She is always interested in what I am working on even though she does not totally understand it.
Her biggest contribution to my trading is her listening. When I am frustrated what I am working on she listens to what I have to say and gives me advice or just lets me vent.
When I am on the computer too much she always ask "Are you working on work stuff or Silver Dragon stuff?" This is my queue that I need to come back to reality
nosce te ipsum
Trade what the market is doing; NOT what you think its going to do.
The following 9 users say Thank You to Silver Dragon for this post:
I am only 22, single, and currently living with my parents. So I do not have a wife and kids take, but I do have a parents, friends, and family take.
I started trading because my father had started. He has not yet had success in the market, as we are struggling financially which has forced him to spend his time on his reliable job (construction), at the expense of learning trading. last summer, before my senior year of college, I "interned" with him as he paper-traded the ES, and when I left again for college a year ago I began trading on my own.
Needless to say, my father is my biggest supporter. He understands just how difficult trading is, and is as supportive as one could be. My mother took a little longer to come around. she is supportive of everything I work towards, so she was never unsupportive, but I think for a while she thought I was simply trying to get rich quick, and was afraid I would hurt myself in the process. Once I began taking it very seriously (that is to say preparing for the business that it is, and putting in hours after the market closed), she became very supportive. Once she saw that I was going to work my ass off for this she understood that I was not looking for a shortcut to wealth, and she became as supportive as a kid could ask for. the fact that my parents are letting me live at home - for free - while I choose to day trade instead of get a "real job," even though I'm not yet making profits, says it all.
My siblings are also very supportive. My sister supports me, but also makes comments about how she's waiting for me to get rich for, and how if it works out for me maybe she'll try. She is supportive, but also a classic example of someone who doesn't understand that trading is a full time job/business, and not a shortcut for people hoping to get rich quick. My brother, who is the fiscally secure one in the family, is very supportive, as he happily wrote me a check so that I could open up a trading account, under the negotiation that he would receive a cut of my profits. It is an investment, but you also don't simply write $2000 checks to people when you're in grad school unless you believe in them.
My best friends are very supportive but I don't think they understand that this is work in the true sense. My parents friends certainly don't understand. I don't know if this is true for the older adults here, but people who don't trade tend to look at people my age (again, 22) who trade and think that they're playing online poker. They think we're trying to get rich, we don't know what we're doing, we don't know how to work, and that we're too lazy to get a job. They don't see that I wake up at 6AM (i'm in CA), and spend late nights studying and reading psychology books. I don't hold this against them, because I had some similar apprehensions about my father starting trading.
Anyway, that's how my parents, siblings, and friends feel about it. Hope this provides some insight to others.
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As a mother of four little kids and a full time trader of Futures & Stocks,i couldn't do it without my Husband
Support,Its not about the passion of trading,For me it's all about makeing money at home.
I have been a Lawyer for 12 Years and i couldn't take it any moreI never spent time with my Kids and my
Husband,I was Stuck in the Court House for hours without getting pay,meeting with clients etc...So my Husband
Had to take care of the cleaning,the Kids,cooking etc...
Trading as you know can be Ups and Downs,Good days and bad days,making money or losing money,so if
You don't have a Spouse to back you up,its a very risky business...
I am thanking G-D every morning that i have my Kids(which don't know nothing about trading because their age)
but i am Thanking G-D for my Husband more than anything else because without him i could't do what i am doing.
I also would like to thank futures.io (formerly BMT) for opening my eyes for a lot of things that i did"t know about trading,There are
a lot of traders in futures.io (formerly BMT) Forums that helped and supported me for almost 1 year already
I would like to thank Fat Tail for his amazing support and Tips and ideas,I also would like to thank TMFT for his
Great indicators and replay for my request and questions,and i owe a lot of thank you to the Wizard that was the
the first member in futures.io (formerly BMT) Forum that
help me starting understanding futures.io (formerly BMT) web-site and gave me lots of help,templates,Indicators etc...
The following 12 users say Thank You to caryn23 for this post: