Managing a girl friend
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Managing a girl friend

Psychology and Money Management

Created June 30th 2014 by Yukoner
Updated April 6th 2019 by centaurer
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Managing a girl friend

  #21 (permalink)
Vancouver Island, Canada
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sands View Post
funny thread, should be in the comedy section..

Yes it could, but then consider how much your relationships affect your trading.
The FGF will definetly have a positive or negative affect on my trading psychology.

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  #22 (permalink)
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Yukoner View Post
Yes it could, but then consider how much your relationships affect your trading.
The FGF will definetly have a positive or negative affect on my trading psychology.

For me it doesn't, I do what I need to and can switch off. I treat my business as I would anything whether studying/trading in that I allocate time to what I need to do and then stop and enjoy life. At the bottom line job should supplement life, not become an obsession to detract. Yes I defintely realise its a harder thing to do than it is to say it, and I do look sometimes at the markets on my phone, but not at 3am on the computer screen etc etc.

I think the draw of the money you could possibly earn can make normal people become obssesive to find the panacea solution/black box that will make them a perfect / profitable trader. In reality my experience has taught me there is no such thing. Personally at that point of singularity (when I realised that, quite quickly as it happens) I learnt to live life happily without being obssesive about things. Instead I concentrated on simplifying what I need to do, and making my process mechanical and attributable to learn. Eg. Journalling and record keeping to hone my skills. But to distill the sentiment of my post, I wanted to treat my learning as a more structured formal process.

Hope that is a little informative and not to lengthy a response :-)

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  #23 (permalink)
Budapest, Hungary
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Yukoner View Post
So being recently single (not by my choice), and thinking of starting to date, I am wondering when do you let the future girlfriend (FGF) know about the addiction?
To quote someone in Mike Bellafore's books, "you have to be a little crazy to want to be a prop trader"

Here are some challenges as I see it:

1) Checking your trades while on a date - FGF (future girl friend) probably won't believe I am actually that interested in what the market is doing, versus texting my ex or another FGF

2) Having to be home by 8:00 pm (west coast time) so I can do my trading homework and get a good night's rest - FGF will probably think I have a friend with benefits visit, OR I am a real loser if I don't hang out with her after 8:00 pm

3) Being in touch with my feelings and embracing my emotion so I can trade well - FGF will likely never have meet a man like that before and asking her deep psychological related type questions on the first or second date, could be taken as somewhat threatening perhaps? (I mean, really... what is your deepest fear and why does that control you?)

4) Eating out at a nice restaurant and pricing everything in ticks or pips - FGF could find that a little weird.

5) Shopping at Victoria Secrets with her and commenting about how I really should be long this stock, and then striking up a conversation with the acting manager (who I think was pretty) in an effort to learn more about the business. - FGF could be confused with the numbers I am writing down

6) That awkward first visit to my home. - FGF might feel a bit weird with the bloomberg everywhere, the 6 monitors scrolling red and green, T4 by my bedside. Hmmmm, maybe I should take out the computer in the bathroom she would use?

7) Accidentally leaving my psychological trading journal in her car - FGF would definitely never call me back

So yea, there you have it. A few challenges I can forecast with FGF. Please weigh in with any help or advice you can give me.

Good Trades,

PS. My ex didn't leave me over trading.

If trading is an addiction for you and not a source of income than it's too bad for you...

1) If you can't have a life as a trader, same thing applies.

2) If you don't hang out with your GF after 8PM; YOU ARE a loser. A big one actually!

3) Get over it; you can't trade profitable if you are on an emotional roller-coster. Not saying some up-downs might happen.

4) Don't do it.

5) You are starting to convince me you shouldn't have a GF in the first place.

6) Go to her place first.

7) Does it include drawings like in the movie American Psycho?

ps.: I was trying to help.
ps2.: edit the title to: "how to manage yourself if you want a GF" ...

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  #24 (permalink)
Vancouver Island, Canada
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I should clarify, that the original post is tongue in check. Sarcasm with some truthiness.

Nice to see @bigmike start a post about relationships and take this whole topic to a more serious level.

Oh, and the FGF thought the post was funny!

Good Trades,

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  #25 (permalink)
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kevinkdog View Post
I hope your wife/girlfriend appreciates all the thought and research you have put into this!!

The man has spent many hours poring over the catalogs...

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  #26 (permalink)
Vancouver Island, Canada
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Favorite Futures: ES CL RTY Stocks
Posts: 58 since Nov 2013
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Funny, but this thread showed up on my phone ... reread it and got a good laugh!

That FGF and I broke up a few months later. She was 85% there, but I refused to settle for less than 100%. (Thankfully)

Later that year, in Aug 2016 I met the woman who is now my wife! (Amazing story how that happened)

Now I have someone who is supportive of my trading. She actually will have a discussion with me on it, and listens to the occasional webinar with me (like the Yra Harris interview by FT71).

I canít accurately describe the significant difference it makes having someone who loves you also give you their support in oneís trading passion... but certainly it gives me a Mental Edge.


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  #27 (permalink)
Posts: 9 since Mar 2019

I like it

interesting approach to business. I definitely like you!

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  #28 (permalink)
Posts: 9 since Mar 2019

You are lucky.

Now I have someone who is supportive of my trading. She actually will have a discussion with me on it.....

You are lucky.

Ain't got no cash, ain't got no style
Ain't got not girl to make you smile
But don't worry be happy

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  #29 (permalink)
south africa
Posts: 170 since Dec 2018

For me it just took forever to figure out that happiness is being a bachelor for life with no kids.

With kids, I had all these ideas of living my dreams out through them but instead I actually have to realize my dreams in my lifetime now.

"Married men live longer. Yes. And an indoor cat also lives longer. It's a furball with a broken spirit, that can only look out on a world it can never enjoy. But it does technically live longer"
--Bill Maher

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