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How do I not take losses personally?


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How do I not take losses personally?

  #21 (permalink)
 
Massive l's Avatar
 Massive l 
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You're rarely trading under ideal conditions.
The best you can do is bet when your ideal pattern (although never actually perfect)
appears. Have your risk setup before hand without expectations either way.
Of course we know what you want (to win) but you're not expecting buyers or sellers
to do what you want. That way when price doesn't move your way, you can accept
it's not working and exit. There will be a time when price goes for you. Don't cut it short!

You have to give money a different meaning. It's a stat.
I rarely look at $$$. I'm just playing the game and executing.
You have to keep it simple.

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  #22 (permalink)
 MeanBean 
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Not to be to dense... So you are saying you trade using a self defined construct that is based on rules designed to remove arbitrary input that does not allign with your known positive learned patterns? Thus enabling yourself to trade with more control do to perceptual control.


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  #23 (permalink)
 
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 Fritzk 
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If I may chime in ...
Great piece of advice I got from the Market Wizards books is, "trade such a small percentage of your account that it is almost a waste of your time."
I recommend the Market Wizards trilogy. The common denominator of all those successful traders was, if you lose, trade smaller. If it bothers you, take a break. Three losses, go flat and take a break. Some of them would shut down if they lost 1% of a trade. One fellow even hired a guy to look over his shoulder and give him shit if he didn't follow his money management rules. That's all the guy did. That would be funny but hey, whatever works. If you played poker and went all in every hand ... you would be the first one out. Pay the absolute minimum to see the next card. Same in trading, pay the absolute minimum to see the next tick. It has been repeated on almost every other thread here, money management is everything.

Next thing is unreal expectations. Some of those successful traders in the books took many, many years working 12 to 16 hours a day to become successful. Only one or two said they were successful right away. That's not the norm, that's the exception. Most of those super successful traders blew out account after account before they figured it out. That's normal. Not very often you find out right away what works for you, but you sure do find out what doesn't work.
The theory is, it takes 10,000 hours to become an expert. That's years and years staring at charts and patterns, studying, learning, and trying again. Don't make me bring up a Babe Ruth cliche .....

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  #24 (permalink)
 
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 Massive l 
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MeanBean View Post
Not to be to dense... So you are saying you trade using a self defined construct that is based on rules designed to remove arbitrary input that does not allign with your known positive learned patterns? Thus enabling yourself to trade with more control do to perceptual control.


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I guess you could say that. It's a very cut and dry strategy.

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  #25 (permalink)
 Yukoner 
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MeanBean View Post
But we are still all human. In my college physics class I was always bothered that we spent so much time focusing on "ideal" mechanics. We all feel gravity even if our head may be in the clouds. To suggest a person can really not treat money as money is hard for me to fathom. Money only works after all because we are trained to give it value. Is it really possible to untrain yourself and to trade under these "ideal' conditions?

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@MeanBean you have to teach your mind to think in probabilities when trading. Then the focus becomes on the process of trading well, and eventually those numbers in the trading account will become real money when it hits your bank account...

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  #26 (permalink)
 
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 tlopez51 
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MeanBean View Post
In my college physics class I was always bothered that we spent so much time focusing on "ideal" mechanics.

Try this one: Quotes from Brad at shadowtrader.com

Rule 1: Trade to trade well and not to make lots of $$$. Your P&L will take care of itself if you adhere to rule one.

Rule 2: Know when you're wrong.

Rule 3. Staying wrong is worse than being wrong.

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  #27 (permalink)
 
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 teamtc247 
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I'm still working on this one, but what you have to do is realize nothing is 100 percent; the market is going to do what it wants. You’ve lost it, it’s gone don’t think about making up. Look for the next opportunity. As Wolfiewolf said earlier, learn to think in probabilities. Everything you do remain consistent. When you start getting emotional about your losses take a break look around at all the good things you have going on in your life and be grateful for the things you have, stop thinking about the money.

This is what I think about when I’m down, things could be worse, I’m not in some third world country like Liberia living in a shack without running water and trading is not even a possibility because the economy sucks and there’s no jobs and you don’t even have the opportunity to dig yourself out of the extreme poverty.

Happy Trading!

Process oriented goals #1.
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  #28 (permalink)
 
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 tderrick 
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teamtc247 View Post
I'm still working on this one, but what you have to do is realize nothing is 100 percent; the market is going to do what it wants. You’ve lost it, it’s gone don’t think about making up. Look for the next opportunity. As Wolfiewolf said earlier, learn to think in probabilities. Everything you do remain consistent. When you start getting emotional about your losses take a break look around at all the good things you have going on in your life and be grateful for the things you have, stop thinking about the money.

This is what I think about when I’m down, things could be worse, I’m not in some third world country like Liberia living in a shack without running water and trading is not even a possibility because the economy sucks and there’s no jobs and you don’t even have the opportunity to dig yourself out of the extreme poverty.

Happy Trading!


Now that is a great mindset

It's so easy to get caught up in the industrial complex ...

I will use that tomorrow ...


AJ
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  #29 (permalink)
 
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 Rachel 
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Nashville22 View Post
I am just wondering how some of you got over losses being painful to you emotionally. I am good about taking losses and I always predefine my loss before I enter. However, the losses still affect me psychologically. Have any of you experienced this, and if so, how did you grow where you didn't take losses personally?

Thanks in advance.

Hi Nashville22,

I have been trading for about 9 years and did stocks before that.
Some people like Doctors etc. are groomed to not make mistakes because it can cost their patient's their life.
So, some people have a mindset to always be right.
These types of people have a lot of re-programming to become a successful trader (if they come into this arena) because there are just days, the market takes away your money etc.

I use EFT emotional freedom technique to reprogram myself and it has worked for me. If you are the type of person that tunes into your emotional side and are observant I suggest giving it a try.

You can buy a book on EFT or Tapping (what they call it now) to learn more about it.
I have found it gives results very quickly, once you are familar on how to use it.
I have used it for a number of things: when my Mom passed away, help with the grief, for health issues and for trading.

Basically your body has electrical current flowing through the cells of the body and meridan flows. Something tramatic happens and those flows become interrupted, like a hiccup. By doing EFT, watching your emotions as you do it, becoming familar where the emotional problem is, then do EFT for that emotion, you can work through it very quickly.
Example: had some losses and started to feel insecure about myself as a trader etc. Did the EFT, saw it was bringing up emotions of fear and other stuff. So, I did EFT for fear etc and got rid of this negative emotions very quickly.

Years ago, I bought $45.00 worth of CD's that showed how to do EFT and saw people getting rid of all kinds of problems from fear of going into water, this one man had this fear of water all his life; after a 30m session he was able to dip himself in the water completely. They came back and checked up on him and he was enjoying going to the beach enjoying water sports with his kids. The problem was gone for good!

It took me about 1-2 weeks before I got it down and have had very good results with it.

Also, losses are a part of trading. The thing I have learned is, wait for the best set ups. I under trade.
You make a profit, keep it. I used to make money at the beginning of the day and then give it back as the day proceeded. With time, I have learned, trading is not like going to a 9-5 job. Just wait for the best set ups and then you will be successful. Take good notes, learn from your losses, so you don't repeat them.

I have watched traders, who have been trading for years, they wait, they have patience and when they do act and have a successful trade, it doesn't emotionally send them on a high. They are seasoned traders. A successful trade is experienced the same as a trade that doesn't go your way. It is a numbers game.

Watch your PNL and if you start to have a draw down (whatever you put in place: 10% for example) go into sim trading, until you start being profitable again. EVERY TRADER can go into a loosing streak, it is all about how the market is moving and if you are using the right set up for that time in that market.

Don't look at a loosing trade as a negative thing, look at it proactively: what can I learn from this so I don't do it again. Always keep learning, improving, watch your PNL, use proper money management and you will be fine.

NOTE: Try EFT, it works faster than going to a therapist and it is a lot less expensive.

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  #30 (permalink)
 
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Nashville22 View Post
I am just wondering how some of you got over losses being painful to you emotionally. I am good about taking losses and I always predefine my loss before I enter. However, the losses still affect me psychologically. Have any of you experienced this, and if so, how did you grow where you didn't take losses personally?

Thanks in advance.

I think you are half way there in recognizing you have an issue.

I wouldn't discount the use of a therapist but considering you recognize the issue you have, what steps do you think would get you towards a resolution?

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