Hello everybody. I decided last week that I would create a new journal in the elite section at the start of the New Year, so here it is.
Reading my first log now, I'm reminded of the many mistakes I made. Something in particular stands out: I've always been serious about becoming profitable on paper, but I haven't been willing to make the personal adjustments and sacrifices in order to achieve profitability. I imagine this is true for other unsuccessful retail traders as well.
Everybody knows what to do and is capable of doing it, but only a fraction of those people will actually do what it takes. What separates the successful and unsuccessful, in my mind, is true desire: I believe that if you want something bad enough, you will find a way to achieve it. Of course there are other factors that come into play, but this sums it up for me. This is all very cliche, but it's true.
In my case, I've always had contradicting and incompatible habits and values to trading, and in 2019 I acted as if I could get away without making any sacrifices, even while knowing there was a good chance this wasn't possible. I have made multiple attempts at changing some things about myself and have failed, and I've had a couple "false break-outs" too. However, these short-comings will never stop me from trying again and again. This is because I have a vision of my future, and I don't intend on going to my grave with regrets I know would be so heavy. I know what I want, I just have to cut off some dead weight.. Easier said than done. But:
Self-mastery epitomizes the height of a persons measure-able success. Conversely, we can gauge the depth of personal failure by a persons degree of lack of self-control and self-abandonment.
― Kilroy J. Oldster, Dead Toad Scrolls
This year is an opportunity for me to develop discipline and to realize greater goals. The only reasonable option I'm presented with is "going forward," as I've already tried "going backwards" and "staying the same"- and I don't like either of those options, because there's nothing truly meaningful there.
So here's to a New Year, to becoming a new and better man, in order to have a better and beautiful life.